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Couples & Marital Counseling

Couples today feel increasingly isolated and are expected to manage their lives and families without the community supports that in the past were a primary resource in raising children and meeting family needs. Couples in our present culture are less bound by family traditions and are freer than ever before to develop relationships unlike those of the families that they were raised in.

With the aid of a qualified clinician, couples can bring peace, stability and communication back into their relationship thus affecting their lives and the lives of those most impacted by them and their relationship.

Our licensed clinical social workers (LCSW) provide marital/couples therapy, assisting couples in developing new communication skills, strategies for dealing with conflicts, and discovering new and proven approaches to improve and enhance relations that have lost their directions.

We accept most insurance plans, managed care referrals, and EAP's (Employee Assistance Plans).  Counseling fees are on a sliding scale for those without insurance.

 

 

Research outcomes on couples

counseling suggest the following:

  • At the end of couple’s therapy, 75% of couples receiving therapy are better off than similar couples who did not receive therapy.
  • Sixty five percent of couples report "significant" improvement based on averaged scores of marital "satisfaction."
  • Most couples will benefit from therapy, but both spouses will not necessarily experience the same outcomes or benefits.
  • Therapies that produce the greatest gain and are able to maintain that gain over the long amount of time, tend to affect the couple's emotional bonds and help the spouse's work together to achieve a greater level of "differentiation" or emotional maturity

Our offices are conveniently located at:

705 Summerfield Avenue, Asbury Park, NJ 07712                             732-774-6886

25 Kilmer Dr. , Bldg. 3,  212 , Morganville, NJ 07751                 732-536-0050

1 Main Street, Suite 104, Eatontown, NJ  07724                    732-935-1881

You Don’t Need To Be In Love                 To Have A Successful Marriage

Many people confuse ‘loving’ someone with being ‘in love’. I know that many would claim that they are the same thing. In reality, they are not. You love your parents, your children, and your pet dog, for example – but you’re not ‘in love’ with them. Counselors will often describe being in love as being in lust.

 

Although we consider lust to have a sexual definition, you can also define it as an intense longing – in this case, an intense longing for a particular person’s company, affection, time and, yes, intimacy as well. As we age, that lust component wanes a little. That doesn’t mean we are no longer in love. In fact, as lust wanes, our loving and caring nature towards that person grows stronger.

A mistake that some couples make is that they want to recapture that ‘in love’ era of their relationship. While it can be done, if you understand the difference between the two, you can concentrate on some of the more important aspects of your relationship. For example, when you say you want to recapture that ‘in love’ period, exactly what do you want to recapture? Is is the sexual side? Fine, that can be worked on, just don’t confuse it with love – you can have an intense sexual relationship without being ‘in love’.

 

If you are trying to recapture some of the romantic parts of your early relationship, working with a marriage counselor can do that too. Believe me, the mature side of romance is far more interesting than that experienced in your earlier days.

Rather than focusing on a state of mind called being ‘in love’, focus on what is now important in your relationship – separate the issues, and work on them one by one. Your marriage will be stronger and a lot more enjoyable – and you will still love each other – more and more as each day passes.

 

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